Shed your ignorance
YOU ALREADY KNOW ALL OF MY COMPLAINTS ABOUT YOUR DISGUSTINGLY PITIFUL BODY. BUT IF YOU INSIST ON USING SUCH PIDDLY LIMBS, WHY WOULD YOU NOT USE MORE?

Telekinesis is a wonderful thing, Brother. Why bother attaching limbs that I’d have to metabolically support when I can have as many hands as my mind can manifest?

askelesh-norn:

You are now Elesh Norn.
You are tired of those heretics and their incessant tomfoolery.  You might as well call up your obnoxious siblings.
ecclesiasticNotable [EN] has begun pestering Praetors: soundlessDuplicity [SD], judiciousGrandiosity [JG], voraciousEngurgitation [VE], and ulteriorBegetter [UB].
EN: My beloved siblings, a very dark time is upon us.
SD: yeah.  us having to listen to this crap.
JG: Thiiiiis haaaaad beeeeetteeeeer beeeee quick.  IIIII haaaave maaaaany iiiiimpooooortant eeeeexpeeeeerimeeeeents tooooo aaaaatteeeeend tooooo.
EN: No, my siblings!  Now is not the time for your…  Unbecoming “banter”.  I have quite the announcement!  It appears as if some of our greatest opposition, the outsiders, have not been seen for a few days now!  So may I be so bold as to suggest an all-out, united front against the remaining unwashed?
SD: it’s your idea so i hate it already
VE: ME AND GLISSA HAVE STUFF TO DO.  TANGLE STUFF.  ALSO WHO EVEN CARES ABOUT SOME STUPID “HERETICS”?  YOU JUST WANT THEM FOR YOUR STUPID CULT.
JG: Stooooop pooooosting, Vooooorincleeeeex.  Yooooouuuuu suuuuuuck.
VE:  IS THAT SERIOUSLY YOUR BEST, GENIUS-LIZARD?  I SHOULD SNAP YOU IN HALF.
SD: hold on.  azax-azog is trying to kill me.
UB: Idonotcareabouttheseheretics.  Imustforge.
[ulteriorBegetter has left the conversation.]
EN: Why does Urabrask think it’s proper to just exit like that?
JG: IIIII tiiiiire ooooof thiiiiiis.  IIIIII haaaaave diiiiissectiooooons tooooo aaaaatteeeeend.
[judiciousGrandiosity has left the conversation.]
VE: GLISSA SAYS SHE WILL HUNT SOME HERETICS WITH YOU.
SD: i’m sure norn will love that.
EN: ABSOLUTELY NOT.  I will not parade around with your filthy harlot, Vorinclex!
VE: RUDE.
EN: If none of you are going to take the reclamation of our home seriously, I will just have to convert the rabble myself!
[ecclesiasticNotable has left the conversation.]
Ever since the war ended, all of these Counsels have been ridiculous kerfuffles.  The other Praetors won’t listen.  You won’t need them.  The Orthodoxy doesn’t need help from the Engine, the Tangle!  They’ll understand.  But now is clearly not the time.

Really, Sister? That’s the best impression of me you could manage? I’m insulted.

askelesh-norn:

You are now Elesh Norn.

You are tired of those heretics and their incessant tomfoolery.  You might as well call up your obnoxious siblings.

ecclesiasticNotable [EN] has begun pestering Praetors: soundlessDuplicity [SD], judiciousGrandiosity [JG], voraciousEngurgitation [VE], and ulteriorBegetter [UB].

EN: My beloved siblings, a very dark time is upon us.

SD: yeah.  us having to listen to this crap.

JG: Thiiiiis haaaaad beeeeetteeeeer beeeee quick.  IIIII haaaave maaaaany iiiiimpooooortant eeeeexpeeeeerimeeeeents tooooo aaaaatteeeeend tooooo.

EN: No, my siblings!  Now is not the time for your…  Unbecoming “banter”.  I have quite the announcement!  It appears as if some of our greatest opposition, the outsiders, have not been seen for a few days now!  So may I be so bold as to suggest an all-out, united front against the remaining unwashed?

SD: it’s your idea so i hate it already

VE: ME AND GLISSA HAVE STUFF TO DO.  TANGLE STUFF.  ALSO WHO EVEN CARES ABOUT SOME STUPID “HERETICS”?  YOU JUST WANT THEM FOR YOUR STUPID CULT.

JG: Stooooop pooooosting, Vooooorincleeeeex.  Yooooouuuuu suuuuuuck.

VE:  IS THAT SERIOUSLY YOUR BEST, GENIUS-LIZARD?  I SHOULD SNAP YOU IN HALF.

SD: hold on.  azax-azog is trying to kill me.

UB: Idonotcareabouttheseheretics.  Imustforge.

[ulteriorBegetter has left the conversation.]

EN: Why does Urabrask think it’s proper to just exit like that?

JG: IIIII tiiiiire ooooof thiiiiiis.  IIIIII haaaaave diiiiissectiooooons tooooo aaaaatteeeeend.

[judiciousGrandiosity has left the conversation.]

VE: GLISSA SAYS SHE WILL HUNT SOME HERETICS WITH YOU.

SD: i’m sure norn will love that.

EN: ABSOLUTELY NOT.  I will not parade around with your filthy harlot, Vorinclex!

VE: RUDE.

EN: If none of you are going to take the reclamation of our home seriously, I will just have to convert the rabble myself!

[ecclesiasticNotable has left the conversation.]

Ever since the war ended, all of these Counsels have been ridiculous kerfuffles.  The other Praetors won’t listen.  You won’t need them.  The Orthodoxy doesn’t need help from the Engine, the Tangle!  They’ll understand.  But now is clearly not the time.

Really, Sister? That’s the best impression of me you could manage? I’m insulted.

Also, a word of advice. I'd stay away from a substance known as "alcohol" if I were me. Which I am. Trust me on this one, the liquid is highly dangerous.

You’re still susceptible to such toxins? I’m surprised at me. Next you’ll be telling me you still need to eat!

*throws a lump of metal at you*
Anonymous

Putting asterisks around typed actions does not cause those actions to come about. You are on a computer. You probably shouldn’t be trusted with one.

I worry about some of you people sometimes.

Dear brother, I am pleased to see your return to this blogging platform! The behavior of many of these heretics, their "messiahs" and their ilk are in a realm far beyond that of the natives' debauchery. It would behoove us to expediate the development of planar travel so that we may help these poor, lost souls before they tear themselves apart. It is the will of Phyrexia; do not be distracted by your selfish "experiments", we have a much larger purpose.

And what goal, dear sister, do you think those experiments are working towards? Interplanar travel is nearly within our grasp. All that remains is refining the technology to a sufficiently reliable state.

a-study-in-pinkie:

rnrjunkiee:

My Little Abomination: Science is Magic. Rainbow Shark and Flutterpus. Gonna have to color later cuz of rainbow shark.

How do you even colour a shark RAINBOWS?

With a name like “My Little Abomination: Science is Magic,” how could I not reblog it?

a-study-in-pinkie:

rnrjunkiee:

My Little Abomination: Science is Magic. Rainbow Shark and Flutterpus. Gonna have to color later cuz of rainbow shark.

How do you even colour a shark RAINBOWS?

With a name like “My Little Abomination: Science is Magic,” how could I not reblog it?

whatthechell:

GLaDOS 2012! She’ll fix our country… with neurotoxin…

In lieu of glistening oil, what better way is there?

whatthechell:

GLaDOS 2012! She’ll fix our country… with neurotoxin…

In lieu of glistening oil, what better way is there?

Awww come on! If I just were a phyrexian (and alive) and could summon Elesh Norn, definately, I’d tap that. Oh wait, she has Vigilance… (Jhoira has not!)

She is my sister. And has no reproductive system. And neither do I. And neither would you.

Did I mention that she is my sister? Because that never stopped being something that was true.

c0untersp3ll:

askjin-gitaxias:

Reminiscent of early probe optic designs.


Then you added more blades, needles, and other sharp objects in the final design. Good ol Phyrexian design paradigms.

As I said, it was only the optic component. Something had to do the actual probing first.

c0untersp3ll:

askjin-gitaxias:

Reminiscent of early probe optic designs.

Then you added more blades, needles, and other sharp objects in the final design. Good ol Phyrexian design paradigms.

As I said, it was only the optic component. Something had to do the actual probing first.