asklilianaoftheveil:

askgideonjura:

tragic-female-armor:

Despite the glow-y magic stuff, I’m finding it hard to feel threatened by her presence.

And then she kills you and brings you back as a mindless zombie

Well put Jura. I don’t mind if I’m not found intimidating. That isn’t the look I’m going for. I’m going for a more appealing image, one that makes you want to trust me even though you know you can’t.

Because nothing says trust like a double fistful of necromancy and demonic runes etched into your skin. Brilliant plan, Miss Vess.

And it makes me want to teleport your brain out of your skull, since you’re clearly not using it. That, or introduce you to one of my sister’s hex parasites. Maybe both.

Phyrexia is my world’s inner self. Go down one of the lacunae if you don’t believe me.

Essentially, yes. You, meanwhile, appear to be a brute who lucked into powers you no doubt squander on petty anarchic frippery. Are we through trading introductory insults, or would you like to keep going?

Kill: Bolas
What? If the option ever truly presented itself, I would be a fool to turn it down. No offense meant, Lord Bolas, and I have no illusions as to whether I actually could slay you. Still, I have no doubt that you would do the same in my situation.

Marry: Ajani Goldmane
A charismatic, noble warrior whose magic exalts and magnifies the greatest virtues of those around him. Truly a valuable ally. Besides, I’m tired of Norn getting all the leonin.

Fuck: Garruk Wildspeaker
Note that, since I lack genitalia, this is meant in the sense of “screwing one over,” to use the vernacular. Granted, the beastmage has already endured much, but since I neither fear nor respect him to any great degree, he falls under here by default.
I suppose I could splice his genome into one of my larvae, but I see no reason to do so. I have no need of hirsute, meatheaded children who smell of a tanadon’s backside. 

Thank you, but I do not drink. Anything. You will have to musically offer your infinite supply of alcohol elsewhere.

Vorinclex, easily. However, Karn could excise my brother from the timestream, rendering the question of physical superiority moot.

Bolas? Perhaps. It is never wise to meddle in the affairs of dragons, doubly so if those dragons are planeswalkers.

Niv-Mizzet, on the other hand, is practically Phyrexian already. I look forward to seeing this “Dragon’s Maze” I’ve been hearing about. It certainly sounds as if he’s going to reshape his plane to suit his tastes.

steveargyle:

Santa has a little help this year.  -Event paintmarker alter.

If you’ve been bad, you will get coal.

If you’ve been very bad, the coal will be on fire.

If you’ve been especially bad, the fire will forego the coal.

askthecoreaugur:

askoldjin-gitaxias:

askthecoreaugur:

((hey guys, so I’m back from my brea…..

o.o wot))

((‘Sup :D))

Hello, alternate self. I trust we can peaceably coexist. And if not, I accept your challenge to a duel. I choose spikebeards at blue sun’s dawn.

I believe it would be beneficial for both of us if we don’t kill each other. I know what I am capable of, it would simply be logical since we are both working in the name of SCIENCE!!

I couldn’t have put it better myself. In a manner of speaking.

asktibalt-fiendblooded:

Spikebeards? You mean Gerrard Capashen?

Come over to Lumengrid sometime, half-devil. Either of us will be happy to demonstrate.